Do you have a habit of getting frustrated with your husband, or partner, for not “getting what you really need at that moment” and then doubting if you are right for each other?
If so, this post is for you.
Disclaimer: this post won’t determine if s/he is the right one for you.
In our house, we have weekly dinners with Roger’s parents. I had good reasons for why I didn’t want to go to my husband’s parents’ house for dinner again this week.
But, he took offense and snapped at me.
In years gone by my mind would have spun out on a repeat cycle. “He should know all I do and be giving me so much more here.” I would snap back at him. No resolution.
In my mind, I would be certain that “I am right. He is wrong.”
I know this sounds childish written down here. And, this IS the real stuff playing out in minds.
Note: last week was different and we found closure where I felt more connected than before the “Snap!” A testament to how relationships can evolve.
I share this with you because I hear many personal stories of disconnection and questioning.
In that recent example, I got frustrated that he didn’t understand me and that he missed an opportunity to give me some encouragement. He knows my generosity in our relationship with his parents. Right?
Well, maybe not. Who knows. We are two different people and I can never really be in his skin or mind.
There are many things you can do to improve your relationship.
More often than not, what is frustrating in the relationship can be calmed down so that you can think clearly and take purposeful action by doing 3 things.
Three Things
Number One:
Ground and nourish yourself.
What can you give yourself right now that soothes and restores your equilibrium?
Talk with a friend. Book a massage. Write a letter to yourself.
Resist the urge to dump on your life partner (or to bottle up anger) and take a tiny step to liberate yourself.
Remember that the one you chose for life isn’t the only relationship in your life, no matter how hard your ego may try to convince you.
You are responsible for you. Be generous and kind with yourself and offer yourself some of what you are craving.
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Women all too often give their power away without realizing they are doing it! I want you to have power AND compassion for yourself.
If you are you curious about two more things you can do, then reply to me. Privately email me: [email protected] with “2 more things” in subject.
No judgement. I will gladly share them with you.
Comment below if you can relate!
Love, Kirsten
PS. Connecting with other women that are also empowering themselves can be really helpful. Investigate local yoga studios, workshops and women’s circles as a places to create more support for you!